Photo by Ariel Zambelich/Wired/CC

You must first understand I am a sedentary man.

My typical day at Wired involves two minutes of quasi-ambulatory floor puttering for every 58 minutes spent sitting at my desk. I work out at home, yes, but my fitness regimen could be best described as low-impact snack digestion.

Were it not for my dog Whiskey (she of the twice-daily poop walk), and my girlfriend Julie (she of the twice-daily “Whiskey needs a walk!” reminder), I probably wouldn’t receive much exercise at all.

And so it was with jazz and anticipation that I began to test the Jawbone Up, an...